Ask Boz – Chicken or the Egg

Dear Ask Boz,

Chicken, egg, or other options?


The answer to “other options”? The Egg and Chicken sandwich. 

See, God had just created the Earth, and saw that it was good. He called down the angels and gave them physical form, so they could enjoy it before He made more stuff. But it turns out that anything with a body gets hungry, so God had to feed them. That’s when He made plants, but they got super-tired of roots and tubers pretty quick. And they’re allergic to nuts. 

You know how angels can complain, and God figured “I’ll just skip to making animals.” But then He’d have to slaughter them, and process them, and cook them, and He had other things to do, you know? So He just went ahead and made them chicken and egg sandwiches.  

The angels LOVED them. But they have huge appetites. So, He was spending all his time making sandwiches. 

Realizing this wasn’t sustainable, He returned the angels to their spiritual forms. Then, on the sixth day when He created animals, He created them pregnant. See, He didn’t want the first thing Adam and Eve saw to be a bunch of animals carrying on with each other. He wanted to keep them innocent. We all know how that worked out, but anyways.  

So, the answer to “Which came first, the chicken or the egg?” is BOTH.  



Black Helicopters

What are all these black helicopters doing here? 

Ah, the mysterious black helicopter. I’m sure you are expecting me say that it’s the government spying on you. Do they want to know what you watch on Netflix, or why you chose Olive Garden over Chilis? 

No! In fact, black helicopters have nothing to do with the government. They are actually the vehicle of choice for the modern angel. They no longer fly around with white robes and wings. Angels are surprisingly modern and fashion conscious, and robes and wings are sooooo Renaissance. Black helicopters are totally edgy and cool, and they give your average angel the kind of powers once reserved for Archangels like Gabriel, Michael, and Gandalf. These powers include, but aren’t limited to: 

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