Dear Ask Boz

Did Queen Elizabeth really have 6 fingers? 
 – Ruby Reagan 
Dear Ruby, 
Well, of course, silly. All two and three-handed people have six fingers. Some have even more! Isn’t that kinda obvious? I mean … 

Wait, is this some sorta trick? Is there something I’m missing? Ohhhhhhhhh! Now I’m doubting myself … I hate this. Maybe I’m no good at answering questions. Who am I, anyways, to think I have all the answers? I’m soo worthless…. 

OK. Easy, kid. Gotta get through this. Think! What are the other possibilities? OK, maybe her fingers were fused together? Umm, yeah, so if, like, all the fingers on each hand were linked together, that would only be two fingers. So, the answer is no, then, right? 

But even if they’re fused together, aren’t they still considered individual fingers? I mean, Siamese twins are linked but are still considered separate people. So that means she’d still have six fingers. 

Good. So my first answer is right. Maybe I am good at this, after all. Hahaha! Whoo-hoo! I’m King of the World. 

What? Webbed fingers? Now you’re just trying to confuse me. And I felt so good a second ago. You know, this question just ruined my whole day. I can’t handle the emotional swings that come along with writing the world’s most popular website. 

How’s that? This isn’t the world’s most popular website? “Not even close,” you say. Wow. You know, that should be terrible to find out, but in a way, it’s really very liberating. 

Gee, Ruby, thanks. This really helped! 


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